Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Who I'd Rather Invite to Halloween Dinner

Okay folks, while Marissa's certainly onto a great idea, she clearly failed...miserably. FM(arissa's)L. Here's a far superior guest list:

1) Arnold Schwarzenegger - this requires zero explanation. I will say, though, his puns would add immense delight and levity to the conversation. He's essentially a pure comic genius...essentially.
2) Rosie O'Donnell - even though she's a crazy liberal biatch, I love her dearly. I KNOW that we would be bff's. f.o.r.e.v.e.r. Koosh ball, anyone?
3) Bonnie Hunt - I watch her talk show religiously. She's funny without being mean to anyone! Plus, she loves her dog Charlie. Obvs, we would bond over our obsession with our babies! I mean doggies....
4) Fran Drescher - I adore her on "The Nanny!" She's hilarious and totally had the snazziest outfits for the late 80's/early 90's. Plus, she got to M.O. (psst...make out) with Mr. Sheffield.
5) Shia LaBeouf - I totes magotes have a crush on him. He's my favorite part of "Eagle Eye." He career got off to a great start - his sense of humor really spoke to me as Louis Stevens. I think we'd have an instant connection.
6) Robert Pattinson - I would totally be a fangbanger. I vant 'im to sock my blaahhd. Plus I want to do him.
7) Julie Andrews - She's practically perfect in every way!
8) Beethoven - Gosh, I hope that adorable little menace is still alive! After dessert, I would kidnap him, and Rudy and Beethoven and I would live happily ever after!
9) Peter Billingsley - BEST.MOVIE.EVER! I'm so glad he didn't shoot his eye out!
10) Tori Spelling - It was a toss-up between her and Larry David, but Tori won because I think we would really be bff's (just like Ro and I!) - she loves her puppies, her hubby is a D.I.L.F.

(Sigh) It's okay...I'll just have to settle for you folks instead. But how much better would this Halloween dinner party be?!!

1 comment:

Lauren said...

Hahahhah... you are Re--------diculous.